hi lovely you!

it has been a while, the whole summer just passed by and i just have not had the energy to create one single post here. i am sure many of you feel exhausted by all this happening at the moment!?

what does it all mean!? 

how will we survive? how will i survive? how will our planet survive? 

how can i help?

 what about equality for all? 

how about remembering that what i do to you i do to myself? 

and what i do to myself i also do to you. 

how can we all help change each other to better ourselves 

and by this help us all & mother earth 

that has been gifted to us to be part of? 

ahimsa🌸

right now i am very grateful that there is no panic at the foodstore. 

shops are open again as is my gym.

 the tube is up and running more like it used to do. 

of course we are all wearing masks,

 which scared me in the beginning of this journey 

with covid 19. a surreal feeling of not being really here

with all things being sooo odd.

2020 was going to be so different.

so hi

here i am

how are you?

here are a little collage i created recently of some of my summer creations

this below image was created in april soon after the lockdown happened here in the uk. for many of my  daily one hour "allowance" time to be outside, i created self-portraits around here in epping. 

"the angels are with us"

for a few months i devoured every moment of capturing the beauty of the blossoms

a rose

a daylily

zoom has been a big part of my life

i've taken (and is taking) 

acting, art, ballet, singing & yoga classes 

among others ever since april!

my art classes are taught by

the artist

 joanna mccormick

when my gym opened i could finally go back to practice ballet in their 

squashroom. i am starting over working on my project

"le spectre de la rose"

where a part will be me dancing a variation from a ballet.

there will be a documenting of the journey.

i created a little collage of play/ practices from september 

for you to follow along if you would like.

hi!!

september 2020 me🌷

not every day was spent in comfies

see you soon🌸

faith 

hope love

alice

A HEAVENLY FEAST FOR THE MAGIC OF OPULENCE

hi lovely you!

how are you doing? 

wherever you are i hope the sun is shining on your face.

 and if you are in the shadows i pray for you.

today is the day when christ went back to heaven after having risen to life after death, 40 days prior. the feast of the ascension. the lockdown because of this sadness virus did include the whole of easter. an easter that symbolises 

RE-BIRTH.

i hope and strive for a re-birth of me myself and for all of life. to start anew, to start practicing ahimsa for all of life. to only use what is essential, kindness to animals, animals as equals. to share resources to all of humanity and not only to a few. to see our mother earth as a gift we have received, a place we have been blessed to call our home.

to marvel of the wonder of the universe.

to marvel of all the creativity we humans were gifted. the gratefulness of this moment in time when it is easier than every to be in lockdown because of technology that we humans as birthed in to this world.

to acknowledge sadly that health is a privilege in our moment in time, it should be available for all. then all of us have the possibility  to make the good choices as we were given by god for our planet and others. as of now we have created a universe where a lot of people have no idea about the "good choices" or could have the energy to do the right thing since it's a daily awful struggle of surviving.

i have so many thoughts! i try to focus on hope and the goodness of us human beings.

during this time of being by myself since march 21st 2020 i have focused on creation. to do my art. to immerse myself as much as i possibly can with all i love, all that gifts me joy and fulfilment. it has been a lot of struggles but there has too been a lot of joys. the sun and early summer heat here in england has certainly been a helper in that.

nourish the moment

to seek beauty

this is what i need for myself. many years ago when i lived in new york and worked for the new york times magazine, deeply depressed and was struggling with an ocuring eating disorder since i was 12 years old, this wise doctor told me to go out and seek beauty, to be out in nature to seek out art that i loved to forget the little me and see something bigger that ultimately would bring awe and wonder to my life.  so many more layers here though (this will be to talk about at maybe another time)!

how i medicate myself is: 

to seek beauty. to nourish my moments.

to feed my brain as patti smith would put it.

i am joy

i have grace

i am creation magic beauty

- alice

you know what i am dreaming of for my life?

to live in my pink house surrounded by beauty. space, peace, quiet. to grow my own food. space for dancing creating. to share beauty and to gift awe to our universe. to be that god within me that i am. to experience life to its fullest, to be immersed in joy and for others to feel and experience the same. 

it's been a month since i greeted you last.

let's see what has happened here in epping.

let's have a feast of re-birth.

celebrations.

she wishes

devouring experimenting with roses

i have yet to edit this one.

do you see me?

pineapple beauty

 the other day i had a visitor whom left too soon🌸🌸🌸

creating art for mental health/ well being:)))💜

i have been baking:)

here is me devouring my almond oat cake and wine 

together with the magazine i hope to collaborate with one day, harper's bazaar of uk💜

if you want me to share the recipe i will!

 we have such glorious weather here in epping,

 so i can just wear a dress and sandals😊

i am creating lots of mixed media art, here is a work in progress!

various works during lockdown that i might work/ edit on soon:)

a close up

a version🌸

i do have a portfolio on vogue italia's website

the image below was also created this may during covid 19 lockdown, here in epping, uk when we were  in the early days of lockdown we could go out for excercise one hour/ day and i used it often to create my work. 

dear sister i am holding you💜

 see the original version here.

 this is part of my first ever self-portraitist series

the cherry blossom girl

april 2014

this image of a wild flower garden is from when i lived in east dulwich and often visited the beautiful dulwich park🌷

i think this dear inspiration fits today's specialness:

"angel"

by

abbott handerson thayer

such an inspiration🌸🌷

OH i forgot to tell you about my 3 month project that i started may 17th:) when i am deeper in to this project i will talk about it here! so maybe in june then!

let's create a heavenly feast for an opulence magic future😊💜

faith hope love

alice saga

EASTER TELLS YOU THAT IT'S POSSIBLE TO BE A NEW CREATION 🌸🌸🌸

         dear friend:

how are you doing?

it has been a long time since we've met. 

and i so hope you are doing ok!?

💜💜💜

for me it's time for an awakening, and to do that in the middle of a pandemic😲

 it might have to do with all beauty coming to life with spring, i don't know. what i do know is that i have been through much worse becoming homeless (this is a long story having to do with mental health which i hope to dare share with you one day) the fall of 2016 and not having a home where i could be ordered to stay inside, it taught me to take one day at a time. i still have trauma over those 2 months and i felt so alone, what is different now is that i have a home AND i feel part of the whole universe since we are all going through this together. i don't have my social places like my gym and ballet classes to go to so i have been all by myself for about 3 weeks now. and i can feel the pain for others whom are alone or stuck maybe in a small space with ones partner and even children (i don't know what is best here...to be alone or to not have the change to have ones own space for a period of only word knows how long), but for me this is sort of a relief, since staying with myself is my safe space.

my thoughts is that this can be start of a new beginning💫🌸💫🌸💫 

one filled with more gratefulness and one of a more loving understanding of how we are GUESTS hon planet earth and we need to treat our mother with love & respect. to treat all other co-habitants of ours with love and respect. a world of, as the yogis say, ahimsa. there is so much i could say here but for now this is enough.

we've just had the beauty of easter happening. a sacrifice for us to live an eternal life. when understanding this fundamental; it is possible to become a new creation. a fundamental i think in all various ways of defining your own truth. 

"easter tells you that it's possible to be a new creation"

-

dr. timothy keller

(he is the head  pastor of the church i went to on sundays when i lived in new york, redeemer where i attended the upper east side service and basically kept my head straight on what really is important in life. now i listen to their podcast "gospel in life" where i heard have been listening to his easter services)

i think in this moment in time we can ponder on being the cocoon becoming the butterfly, to when this is over we are to blossom and to be a new creation. 

to pray for all that are suffering 

but

to hold suffering and joy at the same time🌷

to say thanks for our breath to say yes to a better future.

here in epping finally the warmth of the sunshine kissed my cheeks and i was ready to go out and create. oh how dear i have missed you sunshine warmth!!!

my april 2020

 epping essex perfection beauty april 2020

and how to devour the gift of it just showing up just like that.

since the spring of 2014 my focus has been on telling my story through self-portraits. in 2013 a lot of sadness was going on and in all came to a "rock bottom" the 13th of february 2104. that spring i could not plan anything with anyone since i could not promise to show up, so i started my self portraits because i could let myself down if needed be. before this i mainly shot and styled models for fashion/ culture magazines and before that i worked as a fashion associate at the new york times magazine for 6 years where my whole life actually was through the lens of beautiful clothing creations. the aspiration of such beauty designed by alexander mcqueen, marc jacobs, valentino, dior etc etc devouring photography through the lens of tim walkers imagination and other such talented wonders. such a different me. i just wanted to be the dream (or maybe i am just the same still...)

here my love for vintage started though, there were such amazing vintage shops in manhattan then:))) (for me this means around 2002-2006) so come 2014, my work was still focused on sheer beauty but too to focus on sustainability focusing on only buying vintage and as years has progressed i have become more and more aware about so many things. so since april 1st (no joke😂) 2019, i have been a vegan! for our cohabitants and for our mother earth. yoga is new in my life and i try to practice ahimsa.

this is a new path.

every day my aim is to:

seek beauty

&

to nourish the moment

it is so important to see the beauty in this world.

it's a way of life to prosper i believe.

this is where i concentrate my work on right now this spring of 2020.

this image might be an option to work on

 my easter sunday in epping

one week earlier 

the outfit for the top image

 my easter sunday make up with the dress i wore for my day of editing.

 wearing a vintage dress that bought here in london 2015, 

a store that sadly does not exist anymore:(

a beauty in the area of spitalfields.

another outfit for my first self-portrait story created this april:)

my dear art teacher, and now my piano tutor jason rose shared this image on facebook today and oh how i wanna create this myself, 

me being all the participants of "the progress of spring"🌸🌸🌸

by

charles daniel ward

(source)

as of now i am to create a blogpost every 3rd week of the month and on the wednesday of that week since it is the 3rd day. three is what my whole universe surrounds upon. i am sure i will have to explain a tiny bit more in regards to this but i think for now it has been too much text already😊

i wanna leave you with this:

"i feel in this time...it is a necessity to have a plan, a manifesto, an alternative. it's a question of life and death of our species...after tragedies one has to invent a new world, knit it or embroider, make it up. it's not gonna be given to you because you deserve it, it doesn't work that way, you have to imagine something that doesn't exist and dig a cave into the future and demand space. it's a territorial hope affair...in the future it will become your reality."

- björk

(source)

dear friend take care

see you next month

💓

xxx

alice

HELLO 2020 🌸🌸🌸🙏🙏🙏

(update 2nd feb 2020...i am trying to figure out how to create my blogposts from now on. i am not sure of  its format for 2020! in the meantime there is my instagram stories where i post daily from my normal daily life and there is my facebook page😊🌸)

hi:)))

how are you doing? how does it feel to have entered a new decade?

 is this not magically exciting?!!!😊

it feels like the awareness is arising day by day, so fast. just the awareness of we us being all one. we are all mini universes living in "the universe". and/ so meaning what i do to you i do to me and vice versa. do no harm. stay kind. to come from a place of love instead of fear. 

2019 was a major year for me (in comparison to myself from former years that is), i did so much better health wise. i went on a trip to france:))) after decades of being addicted to pepsi max, i ditched that and april 1st i became 100% vegan (with a couple of days in france where some chocolate happened). and the bravest thing i did was to finally go home to my little home town in sweden, uddevalla. it was sooo healing for me. i feel much more connected now with me, that is funny since i am with me all the time, that close ones can make you feel whole and like oneself, oh hallelujah such joy.

was your 2019 good and better when you compare it to your own previous years?

how i wish it was!

2020

my first big goal is to accomplish a short film late spring or summer, 

which in the planning stages i call

 "le spectre de la rose" 

(the spirit of a rose)

it will include me dancing a little ballet scene

the planning and thinking of this has been going on for 2-3 years,

here is a little post about a possible location i had in mind then

🌸🌸🌸

a lot of my still life works has been influenced these 2 past months by this project

then i have a few other things:)

i am in the process of journaling my intentions for this new year so will elaborate in the coming blogpost in february😊

so here are few experiments 

for a maybe maybe be part of my project

the feeling is right 

we'll see if the actual stills will work with the short film

this image you can view in b/w in this post:)

 a self-portrait taking in epping after my trip to france

i was so filled with inspiration

this self-portrait is from my trip to villeneuve les avignon, france

to nourish & to devour the moment

this is how i felt about that beautiful trip

the beauty of spring in france

on a sunny day wearing a vivetta dress & chloe glasses

 comfy look for a very rainy englad day!!!

theee ocean in my hometown

here we are overlooking gustafsberg

where i am to stay for 10 days in august

in a little yellow cabin:))) by the ocean.

our town square in christmas time

one of my best friends ever

therese

she has an astounding view over the ocean:)))

this selfie of us was taken by her:)))

i am so happy here!

funnily enough, i don't have many images to share because

 i filmed almost everything and 

put it up on my instagram stories!!!

i came home and started to write magic wishes

 to some of my close ones for 2020

this is what i am currently going through

all various notes/ ideas from 2019

 what to implement for 2020

i have been exploring with various double exposure type apps

another rose

i explored a still life of some antique cutlery i own

seize this very minute;
whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it;
boldness has genius, power and magic in it!

- goethe

( i put this quote in a post back in 2016 

when i was about to go through way more than i thought possible)

oh dear how happy i am that today is today

🌸🌸🌸🙏🙏🙏

i will see you feb. 1st😊

from now on i am to post every first saturday of each month

lots of love

alice